Lenox

Table Setting 101

  • Mother always said to mind your manners. In a recent Lenox survey, Americans agreed that manners have declined in recent years. In 2005, only 15 percent of U.S. adults rated the manners of Americans highly. And 39 percent assigned low ratings to American manners overall.
  • So, what does that have to do with setting the table? Many complaints about poor manners generate from people's behavior at the table. To start, it appears that many people still don't know the basics of setting a table properly.
  • Who sets the table anymore, anyway? You do! According to the survey, 55% of Americans reported that someone in their family set the table for dinner at least once a week. In fact, 51% of people in single-person households also reported setting their tables, whether they cooked or ordered in. Clearly, not everyone is eating on the run or in front of the television all the time.
  • Experts agree that eating at the table vs. eating mindlessly in front of the TV is better for digestion as well as weight loss. Not to mention, it's better socially as it allows us time to catch up with the family and connect on a daily or weekly basis. So let's face it - if you're going to eat at home, you might as well set the table properly. That doesn't mean archaic, outdated or stuffy notions of proper behavior. It's simply a way to show family and guests that you care enough about them to take the time to do it right. No fancy tricks, just the basics.

    • Loosen Up!

  • The most basic table setting is easy. Contemporary entertaining is much more relaxed. And while most of today's dinners are more casual than formal, it is still nice to know the proper way to set the table. Trust me, your mother will be impressed.
  • Start by drawing an imaginary line through the center of the dinner plate (which is placed in the center of each person's dining "space").
  • To the right of the imaginary line, place your glassware, cup and saucer, and knives and spoons. (A seafood fork also goes to the right if the meal is more formal and includes seafood.)
  • To the left of the imaginary line, place the rest of the following: bread and butter plate, (including small butter knife placed horizontally across the top of the plate) salad plate, napkins, and forks.
  • Here's a quick tip that will help ensure that you never put the silverware in the wrong place again. It's all about simple spelling. The word left has four letters - so does the word fork. That means forks go to the left of the plate. The word right has five letters - so do the words knife and spoon. So knives and spoons always go to the right of the dinner plate.
  • When placing glasses or more formal stemware (wine glasses, water goblets) on the table, they should always be placed directly above the tip of the knife on the right side of the plate. Glasses should fan back diagonally to the right, or form a "v" if there are more than two on the table at a time. A perfect example would be having a wine glass, water goblet, and champagne flute on the table together.

    • Serving buffet style?

  • Make sure your buffet is not only appealing but functional. Buffets rely on proper "order" and common sense:
  • Make it easy for guests to serve themselves.
  • Serve in a logical fashion.
  • Don't overburden them with too many items.
  • What's a proper and logical "order"? Basically it starts with the dinner plates, which should be stacked at the front end of the table. Next should come the food items. Be sure to have a serving utensil (casserole spoon, fork, tongs) next to each food item. And place a saucer or spoon rest beneath each serving utensil, eliminating the guessing game of whether to leave it in the food, or mess up the tablecloth.
  • If there are sauces or condiments, put them next to the appropriate foods so that people complete each food item before moving on. If possible, leave enough space between food items so that people can put down their plate to serve themselves if necessary.
  • Note: If you're on a budget, put more filling foods like salads, vegetables, etc. to the front end of the buffet. That way, people are less likely to overindulge on the specialty items you might not have in as great quantity.
  • Silverware should be placed along with napkins at the end of the table, so that guests can pick them up easily, rather than juggling while serving themselves. Bundling them together in individual sets can be very helpful. Salt & pepper should also be placed at the end, as well as bread/rolls which are more easily placed on top of other foods.
  • Ideally, drinks should be set up on another table or station. Allow people the opportunity to find a place to settle and then go back for drink items.

    • A Few Final Tips

  • Candle lighting should provide ambiance and romance, not distraction or danger.
  • At a seated table, taper candles should not be at a height where they hit directly at eye level, causing glare and distraction to the people dining. On a buffet, candles should be enclosed (think votives or hurricanes) and set to the back of the table where guests do not have to reach across to serve themselves.
  • On a more formal table, it is perfectly acceptable to serve family style. Large platters, bowls or casserole dishes may be passed around the table. Be sure to include trivets on the table to rest serving pieces.
  • Never put take-out containers on the table. Have a variety of serving bowls, trays, platters, or chip and dips available in the cabinet. No one said you HAD to cook. Just don't make is so obvious if you haven't!
  • So, how are your manners? Can you pass the "table test"? Print our handy table setting diagrams: formal, informal or buffet, so you'll always know where everything goes. But remember, when all else fails, common courtesy counts the most. Treat everyone at the table like a special guest. And don't forget to say "please" and "thank you," too.
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